Believe in me!
The Romanian word for trust is “încredere” and I believe the literal translation reveals a different aspect of trust – “To believe in”.
To believe in people is one of the most powerful tools we have as leaders.
One of my good friends pointed this out to me the other day, how beautiful trust is in the Romanian language and, as I am writing several articles about trust these days, this stood out to me.
Some people think that power corrupts, but to be powerless isn’t any better. Many people are stuck in a feeling of being powerless. From my point of view, power is a good thing when it’s used in the right way and for the right reasons.
I have had and felt the power of leadership, but I also felt powerless in situations where power was corrupted. Power seems to have a tendency to be corrupted when there is a one man band in leadership and this is one of the reasons I love teams of leaders.
Felling powerless is painful, “what to do, what to say”?, giving the feeling of whatever I do doesn’t count or have significance to my family, work or leaders.
“Do you believe in me”? Or “do you trust in me?” is fundamental in every relationship. When you start dating, in work relationships, in church we come down to this; “do you believe in me?”
do you believe in me?
I am the type of person that believes that all people are smart, not in an intellectual sense or practical way, but if all people are created in Gods image we are all smart people, even if our smartness is expressed differently. So to believe in people becomes something fundamental.
So when lack of trust is being expressed to me, I am often surprised by it. What have I done or not done to lose such a fundamental value? Sometimes we can talk it over and it’s based on errors in communication or misunderstanding and can be resolved in a short talk. But other times it’s coming back over again and again. dialogue becomes monologue whenever trust is not there.
Trust is what we build all healthy and deep relationships on, and when we take it away we stop healthy communication and dialogues and we stop moving forward together. So when you think about your people that you lead, do you give them trust? And, if not, is the reason for not giving them trust good enough? Is it your feelings and intuition or is it based on actions and true behavior?
What then about grace, forgiveness and restoration? I am a strong believer in second chances, yes even 3 and 4 times, but then we need to reset and start over again.
How do we do that? Well, it starts with acknowledging where trust is broken, addressing the action that has caused the damage. It could be that I have built a case in my mind against the other person, it could be that the person you don’t trust has let you down in the past. Both need to be addressed, and worked out.
I am sorry for ….can you forgive me?
These statements are underrated in many cultures and very often the way back if you have lost trust or been the one breaking trust.
Let’s start trusting and, when we do, we become people that release and build great things.
Till next time,